The Way I Got Married

Oh, weddings.  What beautiful, chaotic events. I am at that age now where it seems like everyone I know is getting engaged or married.  Some of my friends have had huge, 200+ people weddings and some friends just had their parents as witnesses.  There is really no right or wrong way to have a wedding (it’s your day after all!), but I wanted to share my experience with this.

As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to get married. I'm not really a romantic person though.  I never dreamed about my dress, or what my hair would look like.  I never thought about the colors, or what the theme would be.  I had no idea if I wanted it on a beach or in a church.  My mind sort of glossed over that whenever I thought about my future.  I would picture myself getting engaged, something about a white dress, and then I would be happily married.  That was about the extent of my wedding planning.

So when the time came, after my wonderful hubby asked me to marry him, I sat down and realized I had no idea what I was supposed to do next.  After a lot of hard thinking and wavering back and forth (making decisions is really not a strong quality of mine), I decided that I simply wanted to marry my best friend and have our two families become one.

From that point, it was pretty easy.  We only invited siblings, parents, grandparents, and aunts and uncles.  Then, Adam and I decided to each invite one best friend and that was it.  Twenty people.  I had so many women say that they hoped I wouldn't regret my wedding, and ask me if I was sure I didn't want something bigger.  But I was sure that I wanted a small wedding with just our families celebrating our marriage.  I knew the day would still be magical, but it was better than even I anticipated.

After deciding to get married by a lake, we figured that instead of renting an expensive venue for a day, we should just rent a few houses with a beautiful lawn/lake view and have a three-day vacation where our families could get to know each other better.  And it. was. AWESOME.  We found two huge houses right next to each other on Smith Lake.  Here is the gorgeous view of where we had the wedding and reception.

We spent the first two days at the lake just riding jet skis and cruising around on boats that we rented from a old man with solid advice (As he was giving us waterway directions to take the boat back to our house, he realized he had spent the last 15 minutes showing us the map upside down.  This was the point he went. "Damn!  Well... all you really need to remember is that at the confusion, go left.  You'll make it just fine." To everyone's surprise, we actually did make it there!)

The nights were spent playing pool, charades, pictionary, and other games.  On the morning of the wedding, we all had a big breakfast, played in the lake, and then just before noon, started getting ready.  While I was getting makeup and hair done and having fun with my bridesmaids, the rest of the family got together to decorate the house.  I wasn't there for that, but I know they had a really fun time.  I got to hear about all the crazy stories of them goofing off afterwards!  

After the set up, and while Adam and I were getting pictures taken with the photographers, the rest of the family got ready for the wedding.  Then it was time for the ceremony!  All August long it had been blisteringly hot. Yeah, yeah, I know.  Alabama outdoor summer wedding.  

So, maybe that was not the smartest decision I've ever made, but by some miracle (thanks God!), the temperature dropped overnight and the high that gorgeous day ended up being 82 degrees with just the slightest breeze coming off the water.  It was absolutely perfect!  We had the most beautiful wedding with my Uncle Scott performing the best ceremony I have ever heard. 

After the wedding, we had cocktails on the outdoor patio and then a delicious catered dinner inside.  We ate, drank, danced, had cake, listened to speeches, danced some more, then opened gifts from our family.  It was so wonderful and perfect.  When I look back on our wedding I have absolutely no regrets.  I think about three days full of laughter, fun, and two families truly becoming one.  Taking the time that weekend to make sure that our families got really close was such a positive way to begin our lives together and has made such an impact on our marriage.  Our families are very close now and we do holidays and get-togethers and really enjoy each others company.  And that, from what I hear, is a very rare and special thing to have.  I am one lucky girl! :)

Happy Thankgsiving!

To be honest, Thanksgiving has never been my favorite holiday.   I have always thought of it as a milestone you just have to cross so you can finally start putting out your Christmas decorations.

On Thanksgiving, you get together with all of your family and cook throughout the day while everyone stresses about who gets the oven and if all the food is going to be ready on time.  When food is finally ready and everyone is sufficiently hungry and slightly cranky, you stuff your face repeatedly while mumbling what you're thankful for in-between bites and mentally cursing whatever family member just said what you wanted to say. Afterwards, you wander off to watch some football game you probably don't care about while you moan miserably and vow to never eat that much again.  Then, after a while, people start rousing themselves to sort of help clean up, at least enough so they don't feel guilty, and then everyone leaves to go home and sleep.  Not to mention, we're celebrating a historical time period where Native Americans were killed off and had their land stolen.

That's pretty much how I have always viewed Thanksgiving.  A day of eating specific food that you make once a year and thinking of stuff you like about your life and saying it out loud.  It's never been a big deal to me.  I'm thankful every day for my family, friends, daughter, and husband.  Why should I have to make a big deal out of it once a year?

Well, after doing some thinking, I realized that I want this holiday to be more than a milestone.  I take so many things for granted which I was reminded about while browsing through one of my favorite websites yesterday (www.humansofnewyork.com).  A man on there (pictured below) said: "I grew up on a rice farm in Guyana.  We didn't have running water or electricity, or anything like that.  I didn't come to America until I was 14. My friend has been struggling lately because she can't get a job she wants, even though she's really talented.  She's lived in New York her whole life and hasn't traveled very much, and she said to me: 'I don't understand why anyone would want to immigrate to America.'  I told her: 'Trust me, if there is a heaven, this is it.'" 

I realized that I forget these things sometimes.  As my husband tries to find a job right now, and I stress about finals and my job ending, it's hard to remember that there are much bigger problems out there.  We have a wonderful home, heat, food, and running water.  We have loving, amazing families that would do anything for us.   So today, I'm going to spend the day really and truly giving thanks.  I don't want to just mumble something about how I'm thankful for my dog (which I totally am!).  I want to give thanks that I live in America because life here is so much better than in other parts of the world.  I want to give thanks for our soldiers for giving their lives so that we can be free to celebrate holidays. I want to give thanks for our firefighters, police officers, and hospital staff that help keep our community safe.  And I want to give thanks for all the people that have to work on this holiday so that the rest of us can still have luxuries like getting gas on the way to dinner, or calling the help line when the TV stops working, or running to the store to get a forgotten ingredient.  Maybe having a day to remind ourselves that life is pretty great, isn't such a bad thing after all.

Happy Thanksgiving from our little family!

So it begins...

Hey everyone!

Welcome to my new blog! Recently I have been sort of struggling with who I am now that I'm a mom and wife and trying to find my place in this crazy world.  I thought I had everything figured out...after all, I had been working towards a high-powered, awesome job my entire life and them BAM!  Surprise pregnancy...six weeks after I married the love of my life and 6 months before I was supposed to graduate from college.  Oh, I love my daughter more than life itself and am grateful every second for her (except maybe at 3am. I'm kidding!) but I'm no longer sure what to do about my degree (should I be an engineer, work part time doing admin stuff, or should I be a stay at home mom??) and I'm constantly second-guessing myself as a parent and wondering if I'm good enough.

Well that's why I'm here.

I came across someone's blog earlier tonight and I thought about how nice it is to write thoughts and share them with people. I hate not knowing what I want out of life.  I miss having goals and lists and a sense of accomplishment as I work towards/complete them.  Hopefully as I write this blog, I can look back over time and see how life has changed for me and how I have changed.  And maybe somewhere along the way I will figure out who I am now and what I want again.  Or maybe this will simply end up being just a fun place to share my adventures and connect with people like me.  So listen to me babble and talk to you through this crazy thing called life and I hope you enjoy!

Until next time ~